I have been using Facebook for about five years now. Overall my experiences of Facebook have been positive. Recently, I had a very negative experience and since then it has been happening again and again. I would LIKE to share with you my experience:
Have you ever clicked the “like” button for a post, photo, comment, or group on Facebook? If you’ve been on Facebook at all in the last year then it’s almost inevitable that you have clicked this button. The like button can signify a variety of things depending on the situation. It can signify that you like a photo that someone has posted (just recently I “like” –ed one of my friends photos from Treasure Island Music festival). It can signify you like a particular post someone has made about virtually anything (I clicked “like” for a friend’s post: “I <3 Brian Wilson” – the SF giants closer) Side note: even Brian Wilson now has a fan page on Facebook that you can click “like” for. It can signify you like a particular activity (on my Facebook I “like” hiking, cycling, climbing and eating). It can also signify your fondness of certain companies (I “like” Strauss Family Creamery…it’s great yogurt and ice cream, try some!). You can click “like” for an individual’s relationship status and change in relationship status, which brings me to my negative experience:
Recently a good friend of mine broke up with her boyfriend because she was not prepared for the challenges of a long distance relationship (they attend different schools in different states). She informed me of the news a few days after it happened and on that same day I saw on the news feed on Facebook that she had changed her relationship status to single. Below this news, I also saw a bunch of comments. Curious to see what people wrote, I expanded the “see more comments” section. On top of a couple people writing things like “Woohoo you’re single!” or “Be my lover!” I also saw that not 1, not 2, not 3, not 4, not 5, but 6 fucking people clicked “like.” Now if she had been in an unhealthy - abusive relationship then there would be ample reason to click “like.” Fact is, she wasn’t, so I began to wonder why all the “like” clicks?? It was very disturbing to see that people who considered themselves friends with this girl liked that things had not worked out with her boyfriend. If you ask me, this is fucking ridiculous! Why would any sane person “like” that their friend is experiencing a tough situation!!!
*It is important to note that 5 out of 6 people that clicked the “like” button were guys (judge this however you’d like)
In light of this experience, I’m not sure how much I like the “like” button.
If people are able to “like” things, I’m wondering how come they aren’t able to “not like” things? I know I would “not like” that my friend had to break up with her boyfriend and only top of that I would “not like” the people who clicked the “like” button for her relationship status.
Maybe I’m reading into this “like” button thing too much, but it seems as if it very one sided and open to the abuse of people who shouldn’t (in my opinion) have access to stating their opinion is simply and openly.
Thanks for reading,
Brad
I really liked your blog, I thought it was interesting and also pretty funny (in a witty sense). I agree with the issue of the "like" button in the sense that I think it gives people an opportunity to comment on something that they'd normally be too afraid to write an actual comment on. It's much easier to push a "like" button than to write "oh I'm glad you are single, I hated that guy" (just an example to fit into your blog). I think the "like" button is something that people use when it's not entirely an appropriate thing to comment on. I have seen the same thing on Facebook several times about people becoming single and you can't help but wonder how the OTHER person feels (I would personally be upset if everyone was applauding my boyfriend getting rid of me).
ReplyDeleteI think that there's also truth to the "dislike" button. Why is there only one opinion available? The like button can be almost as hurtful as a potential dislike button!
Anyway, I really enjoyed your blog and thought it was a really interesting point that I believe usually goes unnoticed (even by me!)
I agree with the "like" button in that I think that there's a deeper meaning in some cases when someone pushes on it and doesn't really understand the emotions that could come from it. Like say for example, my friend decides to put an embarrassing picture of my other friend on fb and people start to like it. Well if my other friend hated that and got embarrassed, the "like" button would only enforce how embarrassing the picture actually is. I think that the "like" button fails to acknowledge people's feelings at times. It can be as harmless as liking a comment on someone's facebook but if it is a sarcastic or mean comment than you are indirectly OR directly supporting that malicious or rude behavior.
ReplyDeleteI also think that if you were to add a "dislike" button, that could also prove to be detrimental as well. Because say if someone got into a relationship, and someone hit the dislike button, it could make people question why they disliked it.
Anyways, I think that this is a great blog! It was very interesting and a great approach to the "like" button.
I completely agree with you. I too have seen and thought about people "liking" when people change their relationship status from "in a relationship" to "single." Although it is up to the person to post whether or not they are in a relationship, it still seems a little bit unfair to post that they are single considering a lot of people may put insulting comments about the other person or "like" the status. Furthermore, I have seen friends who have been in a relationship with someone for years and the second they break up, they change their facebook status. It seems like they value their image on facebook more so than their actual relationship. In my opinion, it seems like both individuals would want to tell their family and close friends before telling their 500 friends that they are single. They probably also need time to heal from the break up and I do not see that posting that they are single would offer any healing for them in any way.
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed reading your blog post. It is so much easier to "like" something than to comment on it. Facebook is consumed with non-stop "likes" that can be both positive and negative.
ReplyDeleteI agree that "liking" your friend's break-up is not very nice. People need to be more considerate of the person's feelings. Relating to your story about your friend, I recently posted a picture on Facebook of my neighbor's house. Their huge tree fell down and its roots completely came out, ruining their front yard significantly. Above the picture, I wrote to inform people of the intense windstorm going 80 mph that have caused a power outage and has destroyed so many houses. After posting it, I received 6 "likes" and 12 comments. The comments were sincere and sensitive to the problem, but I really did not "like" that I received so many "likes." However, you can interpret "likes" differently. Sometimes the person who "liked" it just wanted me to notice that they saw it and feel bad, but that's not always the case.
Also, I think that Facebook should not come up with a "dislike" button because it will create even more problems, and perhaps a lot worse. For example, people can "dislike" a person's profile picture. It would be absolutely horrible if that happened because it could cause the person who received the "dislike" to feel terrible about them-self and possibly commit suicide.
Thank you for this blog post. It made me think about the way people "like" different things on Facebook.